Hiccup # 1
Sunday was Mother’s Day. It was perfect, except for a couple of hiccups. Today I’ll share the first one. For Mother’s Day my husband decided to make me feel special. After enjoying a lavishing breakfast in bed, my amazing husband surprised me with a home-made voucher to have lunch and flowers of my own choosing.
At this news, all morning in church my 7 and my 9 year-old gave me hints of what I should be choosing for lunch, mainly swinging from KFC to McDonalds. Those hints led to bad attitudes. As I was craving BBQ ribs, the girls were not my fans. So, my hubby tried to teach the girls about being content. I had to let my husband do the teaching. I was so selfish that I would have done it with too much ‘passion’.
Selfish as I was, I took it as they were trying to take fun away from Momo, as they often call me. Mature as I am, I allowed it to ruffle my feathers. I was set on having a PERFECT DAY!
I guess I needed to learn a lesson too.
We sat for lunch, I ordered baby-back ribs for myself and fun food for the girls. Weighed the ‘taters. Calculated the carbs. Figured out how much insulin our oldest needed to have to cover the meal. As I stuck the needle into her often-prickled arm, I realized, there was no insulin in the pen.
So, I grabbed the wallet, a phone, and the insulin pen to go in pursuit of happiness. Maybe not, just in pursuit of insulin at a pharmacy.
In my Sunday dress and my high heals, I was prancing through Bucharest streets to find a pharmacy enjoying the spring breeze and the sunshine. So romantic! As Anne of Green Gables would say: “The outdoors is scope for imagination. Also, it’s so much better to imagine, than to remember.” Trying to forget how I had gotten upset earlier, I day-dreamed a perfect day from then on.
Passed by one pharmacy, closed.
Passed by a second one, closed.
Drops of rain started making their way from nowhere. Entered a third pharmacy, had no insulin.
Out the door in the spring rain. My high heels felt heavier each step. My hair started curling out from the rain drops. My pretty Sunday dress… Well, I started looking like a wet puppy in desperate search for insulin.
After walking over a mile in the rain, God gave grace to a grumpy mom. I found the one and only insulin available. Then, I called my sweet prince to come to my rescue. He got me back to my cold meal. It turned to be a beautiful lunch after all. (Praise God for microwaves!)
Optimistic as I am, I like to focus on the negative. That’s where I learn my lessons, in the negatives of my life.
Do you ever ask, even in the little things, “Why God?” It was a perfect day. It was my day, Mother’s Day. Things needed to go PERFECTLY.
If you ever pray that verse in Psalm 139:23 “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.”, WATCH OUT!!! ‘Cause God will answer it with beautiful opportunities to search our hearts.
It didn’t take much to glimpse at my messy, and selfish heart. God was more interested in my holiness, rather than my happiness. He is a good, good Father who wants great things for His children, not mediocre things. He didn’t just want for me to enjoy the appearance of a great time. He wanted for me to grow in my love, patience, and forgiveness for others; in my self-control, and attitude of the heart.
I often tell the girls not to put me on a pedestal thinking mommy never makes mistakes… I may not yell, throw things around, or slam doors… but in the quiet of my heart I stamp my feet, I scream, and I slam all the doors of the house.
You don’t have to be loud to be sinful.
On Sunday, I just wanted insulin, my good good Father wanted soul searching. He wanted to turn me inside out and show me who I am when things don’t go as imagined.
God simply desires godliness, He doesn’t desire the appearance of godliness. I even fool myself at times, telling myself that I am pretty okay, godliness wise. He just showed me, it didn’t take much to ruffle my feathers.
Things I need to work on:
- Dare to pray Psalm 139:23 “Search me God, and know my heart…”
- Do you stamp your feet in the quiet of your heart? You don’t have to be loud to be sinful.
- Learn a lesson from the negatives of each day. Don’t allow them to ruffle your feathers.