Memory Verse: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” 2 Timothy 4:7 Words: spoken, written, or unexpressed, they all have a message to send to its audience. Some words are music to our ears, some are painful to hear, some are expressing a simple need, some are silly, and some are serious. But, when someone comes to the end of their life and whispers their last words, each single word matters. That’s when with your final breath you would want to say something meaningful, something to be remembered.
Apostle Paul writes a letter to Timothy at the end of his life. As he is making his final points, concluding his teaching lessons, he brings up this verse: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” To me, that sounds like a life lived without regrets. And those were words he wanted for Timothy to remember.
We often see plaques on walls saying ‘Live, Love, Laugh‘. Some think it’s only for good looks. Some people take that to heart and live their life that way. The question is, do we live our life to the fullest and do we do it without regrets?
Few things will stay in the way of living without regret. Do these, and you’ll find yourself whispering regrets at the end of your life.
1. Compare yourself to others.
You may be better than others or you may be nothing compared to others. Either way, it’s a win win if you’re trying to waste your time. There are two main attitudes that come with that: 1. You can be arrogant, think you’re great in your own world and miss out on reaching your highest potential. Best leaders start with a humble heart. 2. You can be too busy having a pity party, having no time to invest in the things you might be great at.
- “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.” Romans 12:3 NIV
- “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people?…” Galatians 1:10 NIV
What not to compare:
Your looks
God made you unique. All my little life, I’ve been given a hard time for my short size. As a kid, as a teenager, and even as an adult I had to learn that my being vertically challenged means I am just fun-sized. And today I can say, I am truly ok with that. You never know when they’re gonna hand me one of those Happy Meals for free… (To the left, it’s me and my brother Pavel. He surely doesn’t have my problem. )
In the end, what truly matters is your character. That’s what God looks at. “But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.’ ” 1 Samuel 16:7 NIV
Your career
1. God gave us various talents. Whatever talent you have, there’s a place for it. Just look for it. So glad we’re not all artists. We desperately need mathematicians to keep us economically afloat. And mathematicians desperately need artists to paint a happier world when economically they got it wrong and we’re high and dry. (My attempt to art to the left 🙂 ) “Do you see someone skilled in their work? They will serve before kings; they will not serve before officials of low rank.” Proverbs 22:29
2. Do your best to provide and be responsible. We all know that the best job in the world is to do what you love and get paid for it. (Sadly, watching a movie and eating popcorn is not an option.) Reality is we can’t always do that, either because of training, because of limited job options (like in Moldova, where I grew up), or because of a certain season in life (like parenting, or retirement). The important thing is to do what you believe is the right thing for you and your family. “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” 1 Timothy 5:8
3. Don’t be jealous of your spouse, or others. Some men get offended if the wife brings in more income, and some consider it a blessing. Be grateful that God provided, maybe God is just working on your ego. So, don’t compare salaries with a spouse or with a friend. “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.” Proverbs 14:30
Your love life
1. A message to the single: The Bible says there’s a time for everything. Some marry right out of high school and some later in life. Some may not marry at all, just like the apostle Paul. Here are some words of wisdom. : “I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 NIV As a single adult, enjoy serving God freely. When you marry, some things change. When you have kids, everything changes.
2. A message to the married. There are two types of marriage: one that takes your loneliness away, and one that brings it on. For the ones that marriage is a joyful journey, encourage those who struggle and never judge. Instead, walk alongside those who hurt. “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!” 1 Corinthians 10:12 NIV For the couples where marriage feels like a trap, that enhances loneliness, remember, there are others going through a similar struggle as you. This might be a training time to get better equipped so you can encourage others later on. Also, this might be just a painful- passing season you’re going through. God will be by your side. Cling to God just like a two-year old to his mom. “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13 NIV
2. Always worry.
This one is perfect not just for wasting time, but also for wasting your health away. Intense worry will show up physically and emotionally. Worry starts in your head and then it takes over your life. It’s funny how I can find myself shedding a few tears over a fake problem that doesn’t exist and most likely will not happen.
- “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 We usually focus on these two verses a lot and we forget to read verse 8 that shares the secret of stopping the unnecessary worry.
- “…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.“ Philippians 4:8
3. Never Stay In Touch With The Loved Ones
Don’t waste time calling your parents, your siblings, or an old friend when you can just as easily like their posts. Here I want to mention a song my husband used a few years back as part of his sermon. Click here to listen to it: ‘The Cats in the Cradle‘, Harry Chapin. I found its words powerful. Here’s just a verse from the song:
…’I’ve long since retired and my son’s moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, I’d like to see you if you don’t mind
He said, I’d love to, dad, if I could find the time
You see, my new job’s a hassle, and the kid’s got the flu
But it’s sure nice talking to you, dad
It’s sure been nice talking to you
We tend to forget how we are like vapours on this earth, here today without tomorrow being guaranteed. Take advantage and mend relationships, invest in them, and create memories. With nowadays technology we really have no excuse.
Here’s an example of it. A week ago, it was one of my cousin’s birthday. Her name is Janika and she lives in the USA. (Also, she has a very pretty voice, but that’s not the point 🙂 ) She wished two things on her birthday: snow and to see all her cousins. God gave her snow. (Her wish became true all the way to Romania…) Because life took all my 34 cousins around the world, second wish was kind of hard to manage. But, we praise God for someone else who got inspired to take advantage of our technology. As a result, Viorica (the wife of my cousin Peter) arranged a Skype call with everyone. So, here we are separated by oceans reconnecting. It’s true, we were all talking at the same time, possibly even the same language, but we all had a blast. Before we knew it, aunts and uncles joined the video conference. It felt a little bit like The Big Fat Greek Wedding, but who cares, we had a memorable experience in the middle of our busy lives.
4. Never Be Spontaneous
It’s too risky. You might have too much unplanned fun. So, getting away for a weekend or even to a coffee shop takes away from work. Knowing that time is money, don’t let it go to waste… I hope you sense the tone, and allow yourself to enjoy freedom. If you have snow, like we do in Romania, go sledding, ice-skating, skiing… you name it. If you are in Florida or Dubai, enjoy the beach!
Do something relaxing and spontaneous, be it a snowman or a sandcastle!
Things I need to work on:
- I will stop comparing myself to others
- I will start thinking on what is true, lovely, pure, and noble
- I will pick up the phone to call my parents, my siblings, a friend… or my 34 cousins 🙂
- I will be spontaneous